rukafais asked: in honour of your most recent reblog: fallen london coffeeshop au
Oh my god. This is a very big idea. Every commendation. Okay, some initial thoughts:
The menu has words like ‘macchucino’ and ‘esspressant.’
The person handling the cash register speaks in one-word sentences, mostly just repeats your total back to you, and spends uncomfortably long handling change.
Millicent and Penstock are two extremely loyal customers who show up every day, and each time say enthusiastically “We just love this place.” It’s getting a little off-putting, honestly.
There’s this one customer who constantly complains about how long their order is taking, berates the staff caustically, and won’t shut up about how ravenous they are. “Former employee,” Veils mutters apologetically to whoever’s listening.
Like with all coffeeshops, there are some very weird people who think they are much smarter than they are. They all tend to hang out together – calling themselves anarchists, communists, even the occasional fascist – mostly declaring loudly to each other that everything should be free, making pointed looks at the price list when waiters draw near. “We should make…” murmurs one of them thoughtfully. “We should make a light bomb. A bomb of light. That’d show them. Ironic, you know?” Everyone else mumbles reflective assent, paying no attention whatsoever.
They say people have spent days in the room that holds the accounting records, slowly forgetting everything about who they are. The records themselves are spoken of only in hushed tones and indirect metaphors.
And do not under any circumstances mention to any of the staff that snobby, pretentious, good-for-nothing Cafe Parabola just across the street.